Bill Foelker 1922 - 2012

Well, if you read the previous post HERE, then you know what has happened.  We were all pretty much in shock as it happened so quickly and so unexpectedly.  John had talked to Bill earlier in the day about going to rehab and Bill thought he could go to rehab and then have John take him to his home and get what ever clothes he wanted to bring back...I don't think he quite got the picture!

Lots of emotion tied up with this death...the passing of both our mothers was expected, the loss of Bill was so unexpected that it just seems so surreal.  It is difficult to grasp that he is really gone.

I may have mentioned when writing about Elsa's journey, that all the great - grandchildren's most memorable memories were of Bill and Elsa taking them "shoe shopping"...usually twice a year...first in the late summer for new school shoes, then again in the spring...maybe around Easter or even when the weather turned warmer, when the girls would select flip flops or sandals...That was a tradition that Bill and Elsa started when Dina and Lacey were quite young.  And there were years when Bill alone took the girls shopping, even for new school clothes.  And of course it was most often at Nordstrom's, but as pre-teens and teens, it was probably at such stores like The Gap, and Grandpa never batted an eye with cost...it was just something he did.  It was usually followed with lunch out too...and in later years my girls would pick up Grandpa and maybe even Grandma and they would go together.  It was viewed as a time to connect with family...to ask the "19" questions that Bill was so famous for!  And just two weeks ago, in anticipation of "Spring Vacation" Bill talked to both of my daughters about taking all the great grandchildren shoe shopping...and he did not limit it to the 6 greats, he always bought something for his two grand daughters also.  Planning a trip like that, keeping with tradition just speaks so highly of Bill's values for family and staying connected and being a part of everyone's life.  He continued to look forward to doing things and living in the moment.  So today, Scott thought it only proper that he take over that tradition.  We met Dina's family in the shoe department and each of the children picked out  new shoes.  "Papa Scott" had to work on really following his father's tradition...anything goes, nothing is questioned (that is not to say the "MOM" can't question or encourage!)...and this is the BIG one...money is not an issue.  (....he is NOT looking forward to the 'fall' shopping as he knows that could clearly mean "UGG" boots for at least two girls, and those are NOT cheap!, but Papa Bill bought them, so I guess Papa Scott will have to also!)....Later this week we will meet Lacey's family for their spring shoe shopping.

Traditions....according to the dictionary, it is an inherited, established, or customary pattern of thought, action or behavior;  the handing down of information, beliefs, and customs by word of mouth or by example from one generation to another without written instruction.  I believe traditions are important in keeping memories alive through the generations.  The shoe shopping is just one tradition that I know all will recall in years to come and perhaps, the sons-in-law will carry on Bill's tradition.  And one other thing that Bill did for my girls that I remember him telling me that Grandpa Skaaluren did for his two sons (Elsa's dad) was arranging for different activity lessons..Bill made the first suggestion in taking gymnastic lessons for both daughters, then one winter he decided they should have roller skating lessons (he came over to the house and picked up the girls every Saturday for several months and took them to Oaks Park for the lessons)...so if they were ever invited to a party and they were roller skating, they would know how to do it!  And of course, we can't forget about skiing...He brought them up to the mountain and outfitted them with the proper clothes and skis and gave them lessons...then there were the ice skating lessons at Clackamas Town Center.  He gave them tennis lessons too...of and we mustn't forget about the swimming lessons at the Eastside Athletic Club...the main purpose for all these lessons was to expose the girls to many different athletic activities so that they could maybe find their passion, keep active and also to always feel comfortable in situations that they may find themselves.  He was always such a giving person.  Giving of his time, his talents, his treasures, and this brings to mind one of his most famous sayings that will remain his legacy in the Foelker family:  "You Get What You Give"...my children grew up with this saying and it has passed to the grandchildren, Bill and Elsa's great grandchildren...Winston Churchill said something very similar:
                We make a living 
                    by what we get;
                But we make a life,
                    by what we give.
And Mother Teresa said:  Good works are links that form a chain of love.

I think that is what Bill was showing our family...forming our life by what we do for other people, not what they do for us...by continuing to show our love to each other and everyone we meet.  And how much more meaningful it is to give and continue to give and in return we receive the most wonderful gift of all...the light of a smile, the appreciation of something unexpected...giving of ourselves...this is the highest form of being "Jesus" to the world.  I will continue to work on passing on his legacy...I hope I am worthy to do so and will continue to teach his values, his courage, his compassion, and his giving to all my grandchildren.  What a legacy he has left for us. We will surely miss him.